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Without fail, week after week, we will receive client copy to work with that goes on at length about quality, innovation, value, customer focus and all the other abstract clichés of modern corporate speak. It may go on for paragraphs at a time, sometimes even pages, so after a while you just scream out “Yes, but what do you do?

At this stage, the reader doesn’t know whether they are reading about banking, telecoms, insurance, catering, professional services, healthcare, whatever. The reasons behind this neglect are many, but most of the time I guess it’s the inability, even of a very capable and intelligent manager, to apply the external perspective a writer would. Sometimes, maybe, it’s just the desire to get all the buzz words in.

Anyway, here’s an example, not from a client this time, but from a letter I received through the post. It’s not too full of buzz words, but see if you can guess what they do……

Dear Mr Owsley,

XXXXXXXXXXX arrives in XXXXXX

XXXXXXXXXXX has built a reputation for service, and we want to keep it that way, which is why we never stop investing in our people. Throughout our UK and International branch network, our staff are trained to the highest standards and offer a comprehensive service that is tailored to the needs of each of our clients.

Why choose XXXXXXXXXXX?

It actually takes until the next bullet before we have the first clue (and then it’s only a hint) as to what they do. I wonder if anyone will have read that far?

Comments

  1. Kat says:

    I too see this on far too many business websites. In today’s crowded and competitive market, being unique and banishing the buzz words is crucial! Anyone can say they are the best, the most reliable, the most innovative, but does it really mean anything to the consumer? Be honest, be real and tell it how it is!

  2. sara says:

    Is there a prize for figuring out what they do? I’m guessing… plumbing services.

  3. Richard Owsley says:

    Well, I guess if they were in plumbing, they might be working with solutions, so, good guess, but not correct I’m afraid.

  4. Adam Lane says:

    … oh come on! They’re a Kissogram agency cos there’s a lot of kisses in the copy.

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